During my research of actress Gwyneth Paltrow author of her new cookbook, “My Father’s Daughter” and who recently starred in the film “Country Strong” I came across a blog titled, “Gwyneth Paltrow Hates Fat People” and was completely shocked when I read it. Since my curiosity was sparked I was compelled to continue reading. Turns out there is no record of GP saying such a thing BUT Ross Mathews TV’s late night comic from the show “Chelsea Lately” says during an interview with PEOPLE that when Gwyneth saw him last November she pointed to his stomach and said, “What is going on here? I love you. Get it together.” Mathews who at the time said he weighed 22o lbs was motivated to join Jenny Craig and is now on his way to living a much healthier lifestyle.
What really amazed me were all the “hate” posts regarding Paltrow’s comment. Because of my line of work I will not repeat some of the slang that was used, but it appears that Paltrow has since made some new enemies. I do however understand people feeling offended, maybe it is due to the fact that most Americans are not what Hollywood considers “healthy”. I believe most actors (especially women) are pressured into being “thin” (which lends itself to unhealthy eating habits) or they will not get work. Which reminds me of the 1999 film “Notting Hill” starring Julia Roberts as Anna Scott, playing the role of a famous actress and Hugh Grant as Will Thacker a local bookstore owner. During the scene where JR (Anna Scott) is Will’s guest at his sisters birthday party, Anna talks about how sad her life is describing the difficulty of having to maintain her physical beauty. At one point she shares how that over the years she’s had to “starve” herself in order to continue her work as an actress.
I must admit that I am a fan of Gwyneth and I love her work as an actress. Regarding my opinion of her comment to Mathew’s: Was she outright trying to be mean? No. Was she insensitive? Yes. But I choose to believe that she was, in her own way, trying to help.
Sometimes we say things to others that may come off as heartless and unfeeling, when all we’re really trying to do is help that person. We all have areas that we can improve on. I think this is a good lesson: And that is to be more aware and sensitive to the feelings of others. Maybe we can learn “how” to share those opinions, or better yet, know when to NOT say anything. Just as the old saying goes, “If you can’t say anything nice, don’t say anything at all.” When it comes to weight, people who have more than others, are quite aware of it.
My advice to all including myself is this, “And why worry about a speck in your friends eye when you have a log in your own? How can you think of saying “Friend, let me help you get rid of that speck in your eye, when you can’t see past the log in your own eye? Hypocrite! First get rid of the log in your own eye, then you will see well enough to deal with the speck in your friend’s eye” Luke 6:41,42 (New Living Translation)
I recently read an article (http://www.parentdish.com/2011/03/24/overweight-moms-children/?icid=maing) that basically explained that because of the recent population’s overall gain in weight, the new “normal” is heavier than it used to be in people’s eyes. Therefore the general population looks at overweight people as “normal” and thinner people as “unhealthy.” Hollywood CAN have an unhealthy view of weight but let’s face it, almost everyone does now. I am perfectly healthy yet I am told that I should “eat more cookies” because I am a petite 100 lbs.
Why isn’t this considered rude?
If you love someone and see that their lifestyle is taking them down a dangerous road, why isn’t it okay to let them know? If that quote is correct, she seems to have said it just right. Playfully and lovingly yet letting him know that he needs to make some changes. It obviously woke him up and inspired a positive change in his life. Who knows, if she hadn’t said it, he could have ended up with diabetes and heart disease in 10 or 20 years. I’d say it isn’t our business what she said in the first place but her honesty could have saved him a lot of trouble.