I like how man/religion has taken great liberties in their interpretation of what the scriptures mean regarding the husband/wife issue in Ephesians 5:21.
For decades they have taken one scripture (often out of context) and make a doctrine for their benefit to ensure their superiority over women (wives) so as to have control. Yet before that verse many negate the instruction that precedes it, “Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ.” The scriptures then explain that the wife is to submit to her husband as to the Lord. OK, let’s stop here for a moment: When a women submits to the Lord what kind of relationship does she have Him? In other words what is Gods character toward her? Is He dominating and controlling? Or is He loving, kind and gentle? My Bible says He is the later. OK, now let’s look at what the next verse says regarding how the husband is to submit to his wife (remember v21 says submit yourselves one to another) v25 “For husbands this means love your wives JUST AS Christ loves the church.”(How?) “He gave up his life for her to make her holy and clean…” Did that just say he ‘gave up his life for her’? That does not look like male dominance to me. Jesus humbled himself and laid down his life for us, he submitted His life to God for us, the whole world in fact. In this verse is He not instructing men/husbands to lay down their lives, their way for their wives? What I believe God is saying here (clearly I might add) is that BOTH the husband and the wife are to submit/adapt to one another (Amplified). There will be times when the woman will agree and go the way her husband believes God is leading AND the man will lay down his way and listen to his wife in what she believes The Lord is leading.
My husband and I have been married for almost 28 years and we’ve learned together that these verses are true when applied correctly. There are times when he feels strongly about an issue and there are times when I feel strongly about an issue as well. And what I’ve found is that when one is right God will confirm it in the heart of the other and vice versa.
Example: While living in AZ the Lord spoke to me very clearly about a ministry move/calling and I remember saying to the Lord, “You’re going to have to tell Rick (confirm it with him)” So when I shared with him what the Lord had told me, he wasn’t in agreement at all. Then the Lord gave him a spiritual dream and confirmed it in his heart and together we allowed God to use us in the way he was leading. And of course there have been times when The Lord was leading Rick to do something and I was not on board at all! But I would go to the Lord and say, “If this is your will, I’ll do it.”
Bottom line: in a marriage together you are a team: Working together with The Lord NOT one dominating over the other. This is the correct interpretation of what submission means and who it’s for.